Sports! — The Chicago Bears Are Experiencing a “Pelvic Contusion”

Oh, boy. What change a few weeks—and injuries— can bring, like the Chicago Bears briefly having one of the most exciting quarterbacks in football, before bookmarking tankathon.com. Rob and Patrick convene through microphones over a season that feels increasingly over, while breaking down that other sport they call football and the United States’ surprise entry into the next round of the World Cup. We try to answer important questions, such as: What is offsides? Why are they spraying mist at that dude’s injured butt? We’re experts, after all.

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