We open proceedings this time around with a tale about a stork that ended up costing a charity a £2000 phone bill, and things get slowly more bizarre from there.

The two main takeaways are, well, er, takeaways and names it is absolutely impossible to call a baby in 2018. We round this entire derring-do off with a good look at Jackass-inspired injuries and how they're not particularly conducive to enjoying yourself at a music festival. What ho!

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